One of Baby Boomers Biggest Regrets: Not Traveling More

I have always had travel as the driving force in my life. I have been to 109 countries and all but four US states. I do not regret one penny I spent on it. I always knew that travel was going to be my biggest cost and the reason my retirement would, of necessity, be very frugal. But now, with a deteriorating knee and less ability to do all I did in the past, I am so glad I did it all. And I will always have those wonderful memories, as well as great photos. We never know how many years we will have, so I enjoyed every single one so far. Now at 64 I am looking for a place to retire where my dollar can be stretched and where I can get a condo under $100,000. Green Valley, AZ, is on my short list.

Yes, it can be too late. At 66 I have spinal injuries that would require me to try to travel with two portable traction machines which is too much of a nuisance to someone who has always traveled with only a carry on.
Fortunately, like Pat, I have traveled all my life so have no regrets. People who wait until retirement to travel may get a big shock to find out that one of the reasons old people retire is because their health is failing making travel not the fun they thought it would be. I remember when young hearing retired friends of my parents complain that it was "not fair" that they had planned to travel when retired and now they had health problems that prevented it or even in a couple of cases a spouse died before retiring. My parents, being kind, did not point out that that was the reason they had been traveling all their lives, and that love of traveling was passed to my sister and me as they never left us at home. So by the time I got out of high school I had been to all the lower 48 states. No it did not take a lot of money. We camped.
So for those of you who can, better get out there and do it now. Putting it off is not a good idea.
Yes, Pat, AZ can be great. A winter storm is supposed to dump a foot or so of snow today back in my home state. It's sunny and 75 here today, and low humidity. Florida was too humid for me. I've spent the last 5 winters in Sedona.

Plan to retire this summer and look forward to taking more than long weekends. Mother is elderly and in a board and care home. I'm afraid to go somewhere that would be difficult for communication or coming home in case of an emergency.

Even if one does not use a passport, it is important to get one. That is because if one decides to travel overseas (or even to Canada or Mexico), a passport is now essential. Do get one! It is a very exciting use of funds because of the possibilities it implies. If necessary, I can grab my passport and carryon bag, and fly anywhere in the world. Being up on vaccinations is also critical.

During my life, I have traveled all over the USA, to Mexico and Canada often, and once to Paris. I plan to travel more after retirement. Even those of us with health problems can still travel, if by car around the country. The US (and your own country if you live elsewhere) has wonderful, exciting places to visit with cultural experiences awaiting for the adventurer. Even staycations can be rewarding. My near-90 father is currently planning his next road trip. It's not over until it's over.

Being a primary caregiver and with current state of world affairs, I am not in a position to travel, thought would love the opportunity. Hopefully, when the time is available, I'll be healthy enough and the world will be safe enough.

I've had a destination on the other side of the world on my bucket list for 45+ years. It always seemed too wasteful to spend so much money and vacation time on a single trip. I'm thinking about gving myself that trip for a retirement present in a year or two. My regrets are that I didn't take this dream trip when I could have shared it with my deceased spouse, or even with kids who are now launched in careers without sufficient vacation time to join me. (I have no interest in trying to find a casual acquaintance or travel companion to share this very personal bucket list trip.) I also now have an arthritic joint, and can no longer climb the stairs of a castle in Ireland, or the hills of Santorini. I don't want to wake up in another 10 years and still be dreaming about this destinaton, but I go back & forth on booking the trip. It still seems financially wasteful and selfish to spend so much money on a single trip.

I'm not sure what I'm going to do, but I've promised myself I won't have regrets anymore once I figure it out.

Kate, if you can afford this trip you have dreamed of a lifetime, DO IT while you can! Put aside all the guilt of spending money foolishly. You have earned it. Might I suggest that you document the trip by keeping a journal and taking tons of pictures. When you get home you could write a book on your computer, scan/insert the pictures and add more comments. You could give each one of your children a book and in a way share your adventure. Staples can bind your book so it is a bit professional. My Hub and I travelled a lot during our working years. We both had very good paying jobs and no children. We spent a ton of money but enjoyed every minute of it. We also saved a lot of money in 401K and IRA's. So we had the best of both worlds. Funny, we have not travelled since 2004. We have dogs and when my Mom was healthy she took care of them but since she passed we just don't kennel our dogs and stay home! On top of our frequent vacations, I was a road warrior at times with my job and would get to see lots of America while on business trips. I don't think you will regret it!

Here is one more way to look at it. You have dreamed of this trip for 45 years. If your trip should cost $5,000 divided by 45 years is only $111.11 per year of savings you would have had to save to pay for this trip! If my math is correct! LOL!

Louise,
You are one sweet, encouraging person.

Louise - Agree with Deb! Thanks for giving me a new way of thinkng about the bucket list trip!

I so agree with the idea of traveling as much as you are able to whenever you have both your health, as well as the financial resources to do so. After all, traveling is an investment in your overall happiness in life, and you sure can't place a dollar amount on that.

We were fortunate to be able to travel and see a lot of the US during my husband's Army career. We lived in 8 different states including Alaska and Hawaii and have driven through or visited all but 6 states. While living in Hawaii I went with my husband on a work trip to Australia. Since retirement we have set a goal of taking at least one major trip each year. So far we have been to Ireland & Scotland and taken a river cruise from Amsterdam to Budapest. In May we are taking a river cruise in France with some extra days in Paris. We have not regretted any of our travels nor the money spent on them. Travel was always a part of our retirement plans and we saved accordingly. We are traveling as much as we can while we are still able to enjoy it. We will have time enough to stay at home when we are older and less healthy. I would say our only regret is not taking some of the longer trips when we were younger. We generally only took week long vacations while working and raising our children.

My retirement has not turned out as I envisioned. My husband became ill in early 2015, deteriorated for the next several months and ultimately died in September. I had to retire early to care for him (I hated seeing him suffer and I know he felt bad for me having to deal with everything) At any rate, my point is, that we had plans - plans to travel, take life easier, enjoy our grandchildren, dine out more, and just relax) But now that he's gone, here I sit. I work part-time just to keep busy and I do want to travel. But, do I go alone? There is the conundrum. I am spending a week mostly alone on the Outer Banks next month. I don't think I will have a problem dining out alone, but who knows? This will be a real test. Anyone have experience with this? The thought of taking a major trip alone does not thrill me. Thanks for listening. :)

Mary K, So sorry for your loss. I sometimes think what it might be without my Hub and try to push that thought into a deep dark corner. I used to travel a lot for my job and even went to Switzerland one time. For me, dining alone is very difficult. I used to bring a newspaper (USA Today usually) and read it at the table. It was probably kind of rude but it is hard to sit by yourself and twiddle your thumbs. Maybe you could bring a book or read a book on Kindle. People also do crossword puzzles. When eating outside I find it easier to enjoy the breeze and if by the ocean, just taking in the fresh air keeps my mind occupied.

Can you take one of your children with you on trips? My Mom and I travelled to Las Vegas one time and another time we went to Dollywood in TN then went on to a family reunion in KY to see Mom's family. Another was a bus trip to PA to some botanical gardens, a dinner show, then a fair featuring Amish goods. Do you have a friend or neighbor who might also be a widow that might be interested in travel? Any cousins?

Sometimes it is hard to get people to travel with you. My Hub and I had a timeshare in Aruba. It could sleep 6 people. We invited many people over the years when we owned it but rarely got anyone to go with us. We offered FREE accommodations. When we did have people go with us a few times we had such a great time!

Another thing you could look into is your Senior Center. Ours offers trips now and then and as an example 10 day trips to the Grand Canyon and other places. The one price includes all tours, hotels, airfare and other things. You would travel as a group and meet new people like yourself that have lost their mates. I also get a flyer from a travel company that offers day trips, overnight trips and 10 day trips too. The buses are very modern and have ac. Very comfortable. I have never taken one of these group 10 day trips but have considered it. We have taken day trips and have enjoyed them. The people who went on the trips were very jolly!

One other thing, you might investigate books on travelling alone. Look on the internet or your library. They would offer all kinds of tips and recommendations of solo travel.

Here is an interesting website: http://www.roadscholar.org/about/questions_single.asp?cm_ven=Paid-Search&cm_cat=Google&cm_pla=Solo-Travel&cm_ite=GGRANTSOLO

Good luck on your adventures!

To Mary K, I hope you will give solo travel a try. The companies offering river cruises in Europe have a number of cruises with no single supplement. I was nervous taking my first but figured with no supplement there would be others traveling solo. I was right and since then I've taken a couple more. The passenger count isn't much above 100 so it's not overwhelming like an ocean cruise might be, at least for me. Another option for solo travel is Road Scholar. They have a single supplement but it's a pretty small percentage compared to other companies. My experience with them is about half and half, solo and couples. I enjoy traveling with friends when possible, but often times schedules or interests don't match up and in those cases I go by myself, but I know I'll be around other people and won't have to dine alone. I've had no regrets so far and have made friends on those trips that I've met up with on other travels.

To Kate, Now that Louise gave you a new way to look at your trip, maybe make it a pre-retirement trip if time allows. It does sound like this trip is very important to you so I hope you don't consider it wasteful any longer and go ahead a book it now.

Best of luck to you both!

Mary K, I can so identify with your concerns, also being widowed. For me, I was 45 with 5 children. I couldn't bear the thought of trying to celebrate our first Christmas in our family home, so I decided to take the 2 youngest and head out west on a 2 week, 5,200 mile road trip. I surmised it was important for them have confidence in me, in my new role as a single parent. I had never been to the NW, so I was very curious to see if I ever would want to live there. We visited friends and family and mixed in some great skiing and other adventures. I couldn't believe it went as smoothly as it did. The lack of gas stations proved to be our greatest challenge. Not bad. Mostly, I proved to myself, that I could do it!!!! It actually gave ME the confidence I needed to tackle many more difficult issues that have since happened. That was 12 years ago, and Holidays are still a struggle for our family. I feel guilty now because I feel like I abandoned the 3 older children during such a crucial time, even though none of them have mentioned it.
Did I ever want to travel alone? NO.....and I still don't, however I really like all the suggestions offered by Louise. Try to tell yourself..."nothing ventured, nothing gained." That's the way life happens sometimes.
While I don't regret any of the traveling I have done during my life, I no longer have the yearning I once did. When I was younger, I thought it would be so great to visit Australia.......but a couple of trips to Hawaii and the TSA cured me of the desire to be on an airplane for more than 6 hours .

Kate, please, by all means, go ahead with that trip you have been dreaming about! You will never regret it, but you will regret NOT doing it.

For many years, I dreamed of going to New Zealand and Australia. Finally, three years ago, my husband and I took a cruise that started in Auckland and ended in Sydney. Yes, it was expensive (mostly the airfare), but it was worth every penny. I hope I get to go back! I would love to return to New Zealand, rent a small RV, and spend 2-3 months exploring everything NZ has to offer. I want to go back to Australia, too. I only wish I had done it sooner.

I now wish I would have spent less money on junk that just clutters up the house and more money on travel. When I look back on my life to date (I'm 59 now), my travels are my fondest memories - not all the stuff I bought.

I recently wrote an article about how to survive and thrive as a single person in retirement. It includes a section on single travel. I hope those of you who are single now will find it helpful. http://retirefabulously.com/blog/2016/01/12/how-to-survive-and-thrive-as-a-single-person-in-retirement/

Dave Hughes
RetireFabulously.com

Tessa, Louise and Dave: Thank you so much for the gentle kick in the pants. And Dave- thanks for that link! It's the best article on retiring as a solo that I've read! I am taking all of your advice to heart, and have decided to go ahead and plan the dream trip as soon as I get within 6 months of retirement (I'm probably looking at $10,000 with airfare -ouch). Between the blog article and people's comments, I realize that I don't want to regret not having ever having ever making that trip.

I've taken one cruise as a solo since being widowed. I decided that I didn't want to spend the next 20 years without a vacation, even if it meant going by myself. The cruise had some pluses (very restful and I caught up on reading), and some negatives (loneliness surrounded by happy couples and families, bitterweet memories of family cruises, and sometimes being ignored by staff - constantly being overlooked as a solo was something I didn't expect!) I paid a 50% single supplement on a cruise line where I had benefits from having cruised in the past. I preferred the familiarity of that line and a larger cabin over one of the cruises with small single cabins that may cater more to solos. I'm going to check out the sites mentioned by Tessa.

I also strongly agreed with the tip on taking lots of pictures! We had taken anniversary trips to Alaska and Hawaii (we even renewed our vows in an Alaskan church). It took quite awhile to get used to the time difference. Good thing we took a lot of pictures to remember the trips, since I think I was dozing on my feet.

Here's an article I wrote about single travel for ideal-Living magazine: http://www.ideal-living.com/travel-single/

Jan Cullinane

Kate, my neighbor's parents used to travel through Road Scholar (used to be called Elder Hostel). They visited China and many other regions (many national) through this program and loved it. They were both seasoned travelers and very interesting people, so i would guess their standards were fairly high. I would think there would be many singles traveling within one of these groups, and it might work out well for you. I didn't go to the links provided above, so please forgive me if this was already mentioned. My best to you!

Community banks often have travel clubs which take care of all the trip details. From day trips to multi-week trips including US, cruises and overseas. Something to consider whether single or married and the opportunity to travel with friends or meet others with similar interests.

Another source of vacation travel is Costco! They offer everything imaginable. From exotic escorted tours, Disney packages, Caribbean, Hawaii, Europe, Australia, cruises, car rentals and so much more! I have never booked a package but have looked at their offerings and it is very tempting. If you are a Costco member you can book the trip through them and get discounts and upgrades at featured resorts. https://www.costcotravel.com/

We travel with Grand Circle and Overseas Adventure. Both work well with people who are single.

Kate,
Just Do It! I have had the pleasure of traveling with a variety of tour companies like Trafalgar, Globus and Tauck. There have always been single travelers in our groups. Folks make great efforts to welcome single travelers in for meals , optional tours, and conversation. You will have the opportunity to meet people from a variety of locales and backgrounds. You might even find a travel partner for future adventures. Booking with a tour company provides an extra layer of safety and structured days. There are so many alluring destinations out there so Just Do It! I'm heading to Cuba this summer.
Seize the day.

Karen

I began solo traveling in 2014. My first trip was to St. Augustine where I rented a car and condo for a week. I enjoyed it with one exception. It was difficult for me to have dinner in a restaurant by myself....breakfast and/or lunch wasn't an issue. Next, I took a cruise where I met another woman in the same position as I was and we spent a lot of the cruise together. We also met another woman who became a companion as well. I am still in touch with these lovely women. In October, I will be taking a Trafalgar group tour to Savannah, Hilton Head and Charleston...psyched! BTW I did eat dinner by myself a few times on the cruise and got used to it (big hurdle). I'm so glad I decided to travel solo. I'm going to places I want to see without having to cater to another person's desires. Lovely.

I often hear people say "I'll travel when I retire" and I tell them don't wait! I'm 54 and in the past three years, I've seen several friends and acquaintances pass away many years before they had planned to retire. I had wanted to go to Alaska on a cruise for years but kept putting it off. Then my 55-year-old friend died of brain cancer and I decided it was crazy to keep pushing something off to a future that might never come. So I booked the cruise and it was the best cruise I ever took.

I've taken five trips through Road Scholar and this year I'll be taking trips number 6 and 7. (Savannah in less than two weeks! Yay!). I always go solo and have a great time. I definitely recommend RS to other solo travelers. I've met awesome people on these trips. I'm always one of the younger ones on the tour, but it doesn't bother me. I always come back from one of these trips looking forward to retirement so I can travel more often, but I know better than to put off travel until then.

Totally agree with Carol - fact of life: you will have more energy, less aches and pains, and a lot more of a daring attitude when you are younger! My husband and I traveled a great deal with our children as they were growing up. Renting atv's in Cabo San Lucas, driving the "road to Hana" in Maui, biking all over Hilton Head Island are great memories we share as a family, but now that are retired will probably not be done again! Go, go, go! Don't save the many for later on - later on has its own issues!

Yeah, agree, nursing home will eat up all your money, spend it now! SandyZ is right. Hub and I travelled a lot over the years and we have good memories of our trips. I never journaled our trips and how I wish I had. I would love to read about our vacations again and all the little details that are long forgotten. I used to keep a laboratory notebook when I worked and went through many over my 18 year career. It was amazing to go back into the past and read about my experiments. The memory of that particular day came flooding back as if it was just yesterday.

I have this fond memory of a trip to Jamaica about 1974. We stayed at the Rose Hall Intercontinental Hotel and it was pretty new at the time. In the lobby they had an activities desk and one of the activities was a glass bottom boat ride. So my Hub and I decide that would be fun! LOL! So we pay for the ride and go to the beach which was totally empty. We are looking around for this giant boat that was going to take us for this wonderful ride. Well, down the beach a way was a very rickety small boat, maybe twice the size of a rowboat. We weren't too happy about it but we got in it. In the bottom of the boat was a window and I swear it was a house window glued to the bottom of the boat! The two guys who were manning the boat pushed the boat out and all 4 of us went out and hit a giant wave! I let out a scream which delighted these guys to no end. UGH, it was the boat ride from hell! We didn't even see anything but the sandy bottom of the ocean! Of coarse there were no life jackets if the boat sunk! LOL! Oh, I forgot to mention, the window was leaking water and they were sponging it to remove the water! OMG! Go to a foreign country and there are no rules for safety! But 42 years later I remember that like it was yesterday!

Kate, I want to join the chorus in encouraging you to take that trip. Maybe frequent flier miles can help make it a little more affordable. These days with the changes in programs, the airlines have made accumulating miles by flying ever more difficult. Now it's credit cards that seem to offer the best award potential. Figure out what airline, or alliance, will best serve and join their program. Apply for their credit card, but hold out for a sign up bonus of 30-50K miles. Use that card for everything you can--BUT for this to make sense, you have to pay in full every month. If you have the interest to do some research, other credit card bonuses may apply, for example certain cards will let you transfer their points into any of several airline or hotel partners. There's much much more to figure, and if you do choose this route, check out flyertalk dot com for more information.

Mary K, yes, go alone if you can't find anyone to go with you. I don't particularly love traveling alone--I'd much rather share my trips with my children/grandchildren to give them the experiences I wish they'd be able to have. But I don't mind traveling alone--beats staying home for sure. Several years ago I booked my first around the world trip with the oneworld alliance. I had a bad moment landing in Hong Kong. I ducked into a lounge to regroup, found I needed a caffeine fix, and things looked up from there. Stepping out of my comfort zone really has made all the difference. I'll soon be 70, still working, but am able to take time off. I start my second round the world in April! You have so many good suggestions up thread from an inspiring bunch--keep us posted.

Agree with Kathy W on frequent flyer miles. I used to have a Citi Bank Visa card and would put my hotels and as many expenses on it to rack up points. We were able to upgrade twice to First Class and that was a thrill in itself!

There are a lot of cards out there as Kathy W suggested that you would need to investigate. Some cards offer a lot of miles for the first 3 months (of a new card) if you spend something like $2,500. Which isn't all that hard to do if you charge all your monthly expenses and pay off the bill in full each month. Currently I do not have an airline reward card. I do have a Costco Amex card that I can get money back on. Most expenses are only 1% payback. If you eat out frequently, you get more bonus points on restaurant bills and even more for purchasing gasoline. I got my bonus check last month and it is worth $330 and I can either get cash at Costco for it or spend it at Costco. I did spend a lot of money to get that $330 but it is money I would have spent anyway. Got the cars tuned up, dental bills, groceries, Amazon purchases, etc. It adds up during the year! Amex has another card that give a generous reward on up to $6,000 worth of groceries per year. I believe it is 3%. Airline rewards are a BIG thing and people plot and plan feverishly to find ways to spend money to get more rewards! Costco is soon doing away with the Amex card and going to Visa. I am looking forward to getting it. I will then be able to charge my Obamacare. Right now they do not accept Amex. I am also looking into paying my fuel oil bill and other things to ramp up my spending to increase my bonus dollars! I am diligent in paying off my card in full each month.

I want to travel but, unfortunately, my spouse is very frugal (too frugal in my opinion) and is afraid of retiring and living poor like her mother did. I had failed back surgery 11 years ago and feel like life is passing me by. Since I am on disability and she holds the pursestrings I am helpless monetarily. I almost left in hopes of buying an old trailer and traveling in that, surviving on my disability, but I realized how much they're charging now at campgrounds, amongst other factors, and instead confided in my spouse. Now, we are booked at a cabin in June (my birthday) and will also go away in September (our anniversary). I guess it came to that to get through, but I also am 8 years older so at her retirement age, I feel I'll be too old, and with more health problems. My daughter, on the other hand, is in her 30's, has never been married and, being in the tech business, she's able to travel all over the world and work at the same time. I envy her, but am glad she's living a life I wanted to.

Deb W, sorry to hear of your disability. I do understand where your spouse is coming from as my parents went from very well off to basically losing their home due to my father being a free spirit and being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I also harbor fear of that kind of life where the finance company calls the house every night demanding payment. However, you seem to have made a breakthrough and are going to enjoy some upcoming trips. It is important that you discuss your dreams with your spouse and plan financially together what is affordable for your relationship. Maybe you could discuss where you would like to go to and find out the costs and put money away each week into a vacation account. Even an envelope! It is exciting to see your vacation money grow! If you need to be frugal, plan a frugal vacation. If it is a car trip and you want to reduce costs of eating out bring an air fryer or an electric skillet with you. Even a tiny microwave oven!

Another thing, even though your daughter is travelling for business reasons, if she is going somewhere exciting, why don't you plan to go with her. She will have to work but you could share her hotel room FREE and do your own thing during the day. Then if possible, eat breakfast and dinner with her. You would have to buy your airline ticket and pay for your entertainment and meals but with free hotel room that would help.

Wishing you all the best!