Living Alone: What Is Your Plan Going Forward
Category: Retirement Planning
Sept 23, 2024 — About a third of people aged 50 or more live alone, according to the AARP. That is a lot of people who can’t rely on a spouse or roommate as they age. So what is their plan going forward?
The best advice is to start thinking now about who is going to help you once you are no longer able to function independently. For example, who is going to pay your bills and manage your investments? What will happen if you get sick, can’t drive, or begin to have dementia? If you have pets, what is going to happen to them when you pass, get too old to take care of them, or go in the hospital?
The New York Times has an excellent article this week, “How to Plan for a Time When You Are on Your Own” which touches on all of those topics, and more. It features helpful advice on how to make sure your needs are taken care of as you age. That includes whom to choose as decision makers if you can no longer do it. For example, choosing a sibling might not such a good idea; they might be in worse shape than you are. Wills, estates, advanced directives, and instructions about your cherished possessions need to be taken care of. What kind of community and home should you live in so you don’t suffer from loneliness, isolation, and safety risks?
Other tips include ideas like sharing a home like in the TV show “Golden Girls”, or in a Naturally Occurring Retirement Community (NORC) where neighbors help each other on a cooperative or fee basis. Having a solid estate plan and a financial manager are key steps to take as well.
We recommend the article highly as a way to start planning for the future when you are on your own.
Please use the Comments section to share your plans and concerns on this topic.
Comments on "Living Alone: What Is Your Plan Going Forward"
Admin says:
My wife and I had one of my brothers named as the executor of our estate when our children were younger. Now that they are responsible adults, we named them as the co-executors, since they have the most interest and with luck will live a lot longer than our generation.
Lynne says:
This is such an important part of life to consider. I was only 56 when my husband of 30 years died. No children, no family.........what do you do? It was devastating. I was fortunate in that our health insurance company also provided grief counseling. I met the most amazing people there, and they helped me survive. Let's be honest; everyone offers to help, but that really only means once or twice, and only if it is convenient. And friends with wives don't want you calling their husband to fix your plugged sink or broken lawn mower. In a grief support group, everyone is going through the same situations. Just as they can rely on you, so too can you rely on them. Having your documents and housing in order is only one aspect of being alone.
carol Ann kokinda says:
Lynne, What you say is so true. Did you decide to move into a community with a clubhouse and lots of activities so you could meet people or enter a CCRC? My husband and I with no children are trying to decide which is best.
Carol
Beebs says:
We also have no children and we didn't want to burden anyone with being an executor of our estate so we have a Trust company as executor. As for our pets we have enrolled them in the pet program at the humane society so they will be taken care of. Hopefully we will stay healthy for years to come!
Lynne says:
Carol, no, I have not yet moved. I have been too afraid of leaving what I know, and can afford, for an unknown. Also, trying to get a loan of any kind, especially a mortgage, when you have no job or supporting spouse, can be very tricky. Even if you have everything paid off, and a comfortable portfolio. I am working with a credit union to see how much they will lend me, and at what interest rates. It really is a man's world out there, so LADIES.......TAKE HEED. If your husband pre-deceases you and you do not have a job, your credit score goes out the window, your credit cards get cancelled (if your spouse is listed first), the utilities want to re-create your service under less favorable terms and your home owner's and auto insurance take a nose dive. My grief support friends and I still meet, several times a year. We share which companies work well with widows and widowers, and how to continue through life solo. Don't even get me started on what tour and cruise companies charge for going solo. We have talked about creating a guide to get through all the life challenges society throws at you when your spouse dies, aside from the grief. I would have started the guide with, "Step One: Take A Deep Breath", and continued on from there. Having a care plan set up for our animal family members is just as important! Kudos to you, Beebs, that you and your husband have already taken that step. Pets are family too.
Daryl says:
Oh no, right back to the early 70’s when credit cards established in my name for over 7 years were automatically changed to my husband’s name without my consent after marriage. Called a utility company the other day and they were hesitant to speak with me because my husband’s name was listed as account owner, while I’ve been co-owner of this home over 50 years. Had no idea all this happens when widowed. We need that book.
Staci says:
When I was still working I made it a point to buy cars in my name alone and open credit cards in my name only. My husband joined my bank account so I am listed as the primary owner. Many years later, even with his higher salary and many successful investments, my credit score is higher than his,
Mike says:
A list of resources from the National Council On Aging:
https://www.ncoa.org/adviser/medical-alert-systems/support-for-older-adults-living-alone/
A web search for “KFF Navigating Aging Archives” will give more advice. I’d put in a link but a second link puts me in the spam folder.
JoannC says:
A huge thank you to those who have included their pets in their planning. I have only one family member I would trust with my one remaining dog and she is almost my age so may not be here to take care of him. I give financial support to two rescues (volunteer with one; adopted from the other) and have arranged for one of them to take my dog and find a home for him if no one else in my extended family can care for him. On this whole issue of living alone as we age, it's tough without children. I have a niece and nephew whom I may be able to rely on and am planning to move closer to them in the next year or two. Am also thinking of moving to a 55+ community so that I can stay active and social for as long as possible. The other issue is finding a successor trustee for my trust. I don't want to involve my various family members in this task (conflict of interest), so suggestions for solutions are welcome.